Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Exciting Things

There are lots of exciting things going on in my life right now so I just wanted to share a few of them with you! The first one being that tomorrow is the LAST day of summer school! Thank goodness-although I do think it has gone by super fast I am so ready for it to be over. Summer school is not my thing, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. Which brings me to another exciting thing-my last semester of college begins in August...FINALLY!! I feel like I have been in college forever, which for those of you who know me know it has been a good while. It is finally here  almost here! 
But before my last semester of college starts I plan on enjoying my summer to the fullest starting this weekend. This weekend I am going to my Dad's in South Carolina. We are throwing my stepmom Pat a surprise birthday party-she will be 60! Shhh...it's a surprise! I am excited about this because number one I get to see my niece and nephews, which I have said many times are my whole life. I have not seen them since Thanksgiving...that has been too long! I am so ready to spend some quality time with all 3 of them. I wish time moved slower when I am there because it seems like I can never get enough time with them. I am also excited about this because my stepsister Abby and her husband just put in a pool in their backyard. Good news for me because I am white as a ghost. YAY for getting some sun! I am very much looking forward to this weekend with my family.
On to the next weekend, which is going to be full of more family time-have I told you how much I love my family? Well it is a lot-they are wonderful. The week/weekend of July 4th I am going to Columbia where my aunt Kaye lives. All of her kids and their kids are coming in. So I will get to see all of my cousins that I have not seen in forever. This is exciting because Jessica, Jenna, my sister, and I were all really close growing up. We saw each other at least 3 times a year if not more. As we grew up, they got married, and starting having babies (which is another reason to be excited for me) we didn't get to see each other much. I honestly can't remember the last time I saw them. My cousin Justin and his wife are currently stationed in Germany, but are coming for to the States for the summer. This is the main reason we are all getting together. Justin and Anna have been married for 10 years and are planning to renew their vows on July 2. This is going to be a great time for family, babies, and food (yes-when my family gets together we make enough food to feed a army). 
So these are a few of the things that I am looking forward to in the next couple of weeks! Happy Wednesday!

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Jealousy vs. Humility

This week has been crazy, there have been a lot of things going on and my mind has just been blown this week. It never fails that when I lose my focus, God knows exactly how to bring me back in. Something happened this week that made me have a lot of second thoughts, doubts, and regrets about a certain decision that I had made in the past. After last night, I realized that all of these thoughts I was having about this specific situation were jealousy. I was jealous because I felt like I had missed an opportunity and may never get it back. The problem is that I don't even know if I want it back, in reality I just think I didn't want this person, but I didn't want this person to be with anyone else either. Selfish. Trust me I know how selfish that is. I was jealous that he seemed to have moved on into a new relationship and that I had not. Not to say that I haven't moved on from the situation, but I hadn't started a new relationship. Which brings me to another point of why this week has been so hard. I have my good days and I have my bad days. Some days I am very content in my single hood and other days I am not. This week has been filled with days of sadness, and longing for my husband.  Last night, I sat everything else aside, and just made my focus on my relationship with Christ. I have so much to be thankful for, but yet I am dwelling on the things that I don't have-am I crazy? Obviously. It is like Pastor Reggie said last night, "We are thankful. but we are thankful for the wrong thing." Amen to that. So I have come to the realization that jealousy is the root of evil and I need to get that out of my life and began to learn how to be humble through Christ. The two things that I need to work on the most is to stop judging, and stop blaming. These are two of the ways that I can begin to humble myself and then at the proper time, when I have the proper attitude God will provide me with the things I need, such as a husband. In time, that is what I need to learn. I am so tired of waiting, but I just need to hold on a little bit longer and know that when I have humbled myself before the Lord everything else is going to fall into place.